A little reflection of where I am.
I need a new hobby. Something simple yet meaningful to do at the end of the day before I sleep. For that matter, I need to find new direction in my life, something to get me excited and motivated outside of work. I've been reading a lot of news lately though I'm not sure how much I have processed, but at least it feels like I'm doing something useful.
I'm not happy, not sad. Not angry, not glad. Just nothing. I can't even stay excited for long. There just isn't any real lasting emotion. My mood is... numb?? Everyday just passes like the one before. Hah, could it be that I'm suffering withdrawal symptoms from the lack of productivity? Or is it that I've got no goal to work towards to? Hmm.. Maybe I'm to used to being forced into work by stress. It kinda reminds me of how I could never get to serious mugging until the exams were around the corner..
Time to sort this out soon.. This sort of aimless drifting might soon drive me nuts.
Some updates at last
Hola! I haven't been here since I OOC-ed and have things changed with people flying off, people passing out (as 3SGs that is) people going into specialisation.. And me? I've been posted out. Haha, I like to think I've got one foot out of army. 1 year 2 months more and I'll get my other foot out.
It was quite a memorable day when I got my posting. It was about to rain, I was happily sleeping at home, consuming my off and at 8+ in the early morning, lo and behold my phone rings! I was too sleepy to pick it up and I told myself if it were important s/he'd call back or leave a message. True enough, it rang again. And so I chionged down to camp and got my posting, out running the rain before it moved up to Nee Soon while at it. Strangely it's been pouring for the last 4 days in the East. Miracle it hasn't flooded but it's an utterly sian weather.
Anyhow hopefully things will be better from now. But no matter how far I run, NS is really the preoccupation in my mind for these 2 years of my life. Can't escape thinking about it. In fact, I can't remember what I used to think about before NS started. Now, I think I'd really have to sign up for a civilian conversion course if there ever was one...
