100th post

Ah.. This post has come after all, my blog has survived to it's 100th post. Been procrastinating about what to do for this post for quite a while already. For this post I've put off posting about the failed class outings to make this post one to remember, maybe a recollection or something. So long I've thought about it that I've forgotten/no longer feel like doing what I planned before. -.-

But well, looking back it's been nearly a year already and I've been trying to document the bits and pieces of my not very interesting life so that maybe when I find myself wondering what the hell have I been doing with my life, I'd get an answer. Ironically though, I've never really read through all the entries, still roughly have an impression of each one, or at least the more significant ones.

And then there are those posts which never got published. Mostly crap which I felt at the time was unsuitable for the viewing of just about anyone bo liao enough. Probably wrote them when I was er... not in the best states of mind... Fortunately there are only a handful of them.

And even before there were the posts which never got published, there were those which never got written in the first place. To quote from an unpublished post:

Travelling home alone for an hour every other day, I've started to wonder about what do I want to do with my life. I mean, while life has been pretty much good so far, I seem to be simply drifting from day to day and just taking things as they come, without any real long distance goal in mind.

Not the best of quotes to use, but I did wonder a lot at the beginning of the year before the academic lessons really started. Wondered about things like life, how I've changed, what maturity is, why people do the things they do etc. but never got about to writing them down. I think that's what they call angst or maybe teenage confusion or something.

Before this, I used to think that with the passing of secondary school, I'd already passed the unstable "teenage phase" but haha, little did I know how different JC was. I think I've changed quite a lot from an emotional/psychological point of view. Gone were the simple days of secondary school where everything was mostly a matter of graded or not graded.

Sure, there were still the big events like certain cca matters, but nothing seemed to compare with the complexities that suddenly appeared out of the blue. Straightforward things suddenly become complicated, as though it was a differnt world that I was in, where while some things still remain the same, other rules can get turned completely on their head and rationality doesn't always exist.

Now looking back in contrast, things seem to have gotten better but I think it's still the same. Oh well, I'll wait till trouble troubles me, but in the mean time, a new journey awaits, next stop, the 150th post. Man, I've really got to break the trend of getting tired halfway through my entries... Yawn...

Eugene remembered @ 10:27 PM